Comments on: Losing Objectivity

By: Sherman

Sherman — Fri, 18 Mar 2005 07:07:37 +0000

I’ve been in critical care, on and off since 1977. When things start weighing too heavily on me regarding the flogging thing, and my real life (that outside the ICU) is unable to reset my clock, I move away from critical care for a short while. I’ve done ER, flight nursing, cardiac rehab, even supervision to get a break and still keep my creditors happy.
I, too have been on the other side of a helpless situation and it trully sucks. It has helped me get started on the dialogue regarding DNR status. I’m also concerned when you said 10 shifts in two weeks. Are you still doing 8 hour shifts?! You could probably use more days off in a week with what 12 hour shifts would allow you.

By: Jodie

Jodie — Mon, 14 Feb 2005 18:56:54 +0000

We recently went through this with Dad. On the last day of his hospitalization, when he took a turn for the worse and it became clear he wasn’t going to go home, the MD kept telling Mom, “we can save him, we can save him”…and of course Mom believed her. The nurses knew better. I am also a nurse — psych, but still knew he wasn’t going to go home.

Mom wanted to believe the MD, though. So treatment continued, for 10 hours more than it should have. Why couldn’t the doc just admit he was gone?

By: Karen

Karen — Thu, 27 Jan 2005 00:49:11 +0000

Diagnosis: gangrenous Gallbladder.
Prognosis: removal of diseased organ/ 90% chance of full recovery.
Patient 89 and still 100% mentally alert.
Family refused surgical intervention, and instead requested narcotic medication for pain and comfort measures,removal of NG suction and IV fluids, refused tube feedings.
How am I supposed to feel?

By: Tara RN

Tara RN — Wed, 19 Jan 2005 01:15:46 +0000

Been a nurse for less than a year. It makes me cry when people won’t make someone a DNR when the alternative is so cruel. Do you ever get used to it? Will I? I just try to be as compassionate to the patient, and the family- as trying as it can be- as I can. Any advice from any of you other RNs or LPNs would be gratefully appreciated.

By: Diana

Diana — Mon, 17 Jan 2005 17:12:39 +0000

Geena, having worked the unit I think I understand where you are coming from. While I was there, I quickly learned that everything happens in it’s own time. Life, death, . . . and all you can do is be the best nurse you can be. The rest is completely irrelevant.

By: Melidy Jones RN

Melidy Jones RN — Mon, 17 Jan 2005 14:15:00 +0000

Like all acute and critical care nurses, I’ve been exactly where you are. Everyone going to hospital for a “routine proceedure” should find a link to this story on their op permit! Because this is the potential experience of the one in ten thousand (or million) person that risks any proceedure.

We have a lot of technical improvements and ways to fix things but there is still an element of fate in every person’s life. We still cannot accurately predict the exact moment of birth or death. Nor do we have complete control over all circumstances. Sometimes the “being with” the patient and family is just the nursing intervention called for.

I enjoy your “tales” and will leave you with some simple words uttered by a midwife during the birth of a family member:
“Things happen the way they are supposed to.”

Melidy

By: Lisa

Lisa — Sun, 16 Jan 2005 18:29:50 +0000

Thank you for a beautiful rendition of what I have seen firsthand all too often. Just one thought, though. You ask why the docs aren’t doing anything about it, i.e. approaching the family about DNR or withdrawal. But imagine for a moment that they could be having the same emotions that you are having. Moreover, I bet some of them feel profoundly guilty. Can you imagine what it must be like to admit a patient for a straightforward proedure, to reassure the family that it is a safe procedure, and then to look them in the eye now? Not excusing the behavior, just advocating for a little sympathy for that, too.